Alright, alright, let’s gab a bit about this… uh… “jade egg workout” thing. Sounds fancy, but lemme tell ya, it ain’t rocket science.
So, first things first, what the heck IS a jade egg? Well, it’s a little egg-shaped thingy, made of some kinda rock, jade I guess. People, mostly women I hear, they stick it… well, you know… down there. Yep, right up the… you get the picture.
Now, why on earth would anyone wanna do that? They say it’s for… strengthening them muscles down yonder. You know, the ones you use when you gotta… uh… hold it in? Yeah, those ones. Like when you’re laughin’ too hard or sneezin’ like a wildcat.
They call it “kegel exercises,” I think. Sounds like somethin’ a doctor would say, all hoity-toity. But it’s just squeezin’ and relaxin’ them muscles, like when you’re tryin’ to stop the pee mid-stream. Only, with this egg thingy, it’s supposed to be harder, like liftin’ weights, but… well, you know… down there.
- How to get started with this egg thing? Well, first, you gotta get yourself one of them eggs. Make sure it’s clean, for goodness sake! Wash it good, just like you would your dishes. Nobody wants a dirty egg up there, that’s just common sense.
- Then, you gotta find a comfy spot. Some folks like to squat, some like to sit, some even stand! Me? I’d probably just sit on the pot, that way if it falls, it ain’t goin’ on the floor, if you catch my drift. But be careful, don’t wanna drop it in the toilet, that’d be a mess.
Now, if your egg has a little string on it, that’s good. You just pull on the string when you’re done, like pullin’ out a… well, you know… a tampon. If it ain’t got a string, you gotta… uh… push it out. Yeah, just like you’re havin’ a baby, only smaller. Hopefully.
So, does this egg thing actually work? Well, that’s where things get kinda… iffy. Some folks swear by it, say it makes things tighter, stronger, you know… better. But then you got others, doctors and such, they say it’s all hogwash. They say there ain’t no proof it does anything good, and it might even be bad for ya. Could cause infections, they say, or get stuck up there. Yikes!
I reckon it’s like most things in life, gotta take it with a grain of salt. If you’re thinkin’ about tryin’ it, do your homework first. Talk to your doctor, maybe. Don’t just go stickin’ things up there willy-nilly. And if somethin’ don’t feel right, stop! Your body knows best, listen to it.
Personally, I think there’s easier ways to keep them muscles strong. Just doin’ them squeezin’ exercises without the egg is probably good enough for most folks. And cheaper too! Them jade eggs, they ain’t cheap, I tell ya. Seems like a lot of fuss for somethin’ that might not even work. But hey, to each their own, I always say.
At the end of the day, it’s your body, your choice. Just be smart about it, alright? And don’t go blamin’ me if things go sideways. I’m just tellin’ ya what I heard, you know, from the grapevine. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I gotta go tend to my chickens. They’re a whole lot less complicated than this jade egg business, that’s for sure. And they lay eggs you can actually eat!
Tags: [Jade Egg, Kegel Exercise, Pelvic Floor, Yoni Egg, Women’s Health, Workout, Fitness, Wellbeing]
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